Let’s get real. That person you married? The one who leaves the toothpaste cap off, snores like a chainsaw, or insists on narrating their dreams at 6 a.m.? They’re not the problem.
You are.
The Myth of the Nasty Creature
You call them “inhuman,” “nasty,” “impossible.” But here’s the truth: They’re just a mirror.
That irritation bubbling up? It’s not about their habits. It’s about your inability to see them as anything but a reflection of your unmet expectations.
The Romantic Lie
Let’s rewind. Remember when they were “the most wonderful, romantic creature”? When their quirks were endearing, not infuriating?
What changed?
Not them. You.
You fell for the romantic lie—the idea that love is a fairy tale, not a daily choice. And now, you’re stuck in a loop of disappointment, wondering how Prince Charming turned into a toothpaste criminal.
The Elephant in the Room
Let me tell you a story. A group of soldiers once encountered a wild elephant in the forest. One man, convinced it was Lord Ganesha, knelt and chanted. The elephant? It crushed him.
Moral of the story: Calling something divine doesn’t change its nature.
Your spouse isn’t a god. They’re human. Flawed, messy, and occasionally infuriating. And that’s okay.
The Sweetness Baseline
Here’s the secret: Your emotions are your responsibility.
If you’ve ever felt love, devotion, or bliss—whether for a child, a mentor, or a sunset—that’s your baseline. Don’t let anyone, not even your spouse, drag you below it.
- See Them as You See the Divine
Not because they’re perfect. Because you are. When you look at them with reverence, your heart softens. Your irritation fades. - Stop the Bullshit
Stop pretending their quirks are charming when they’re not. Stop resenting them for being human. See them as they are—neither god nor monster. - Choose Sweetness
Your emotions are a garden. Tend them. Water them with gratitude. Weed out resentment.
A Story
Mr. Smith hired a detective to catch his wife cheating. The detective filmed her laughing with another man. Mr. Smith’s reaction? “I can’t believe she’s so much fun.”
Here’s the kicker: Your spouse isn’t the problem. Your perception is.
Also Read: Can Trust Ever Be Rebuilt?
Rewrite the Script
Tomorrow, do this:
- Notice the Irritation
When they leave the cap off, pause. Ask: “Why does this bother me?” - Shift the Lens
See them as you once did—flawed, yes, but also full of potential. - Choose Love
Not because they deserve it. Because you deserve peace.
Final Truth: Marriage isn’t about finding the right person. It’s about being the right person.
So, the next time they snore, smile. They’re not ruining your sleep. They’re giving you a chance to grow.
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