Let’s talk about something we all face but rarely handle well—difficult people. The coworker who drains your energy. The family member who pushes your buttons. The stranger who seems to exist just to ruin your day.
We label them as “bad,” “toxic,” or “horrible.”
But here’s the truth: There are no good people or bad people. There are only people—oscillating between joy and misery, kindness and nastiness, depending on the atmosphere around them.
The Myth of Good vs. Bad
We love to divide the world into heroes and villains. “I’m good. They’re bad.” But let’s be honest: This mindset is dangerous.
The moment you decide you’re “good,” you give yourself permission to destroy the “bad.” And history shows us where that leads—war, oppression, endless cycles of pain.
But here’s the thing: Goodness isn’t a fixed trait. It’s a choice. And it’s a choice everyone makes—or doesn’t—based on their level of experience, understanding, and the environment they’re in.
The Atmosphere You Create
Think about it. When you’re in a joyful, supportive environment, don’t you behave better? Don’t you feel kinder, more patient, more generous?
Now, think about a tense, hostile atmosphere. Doesn’t it bring out the worst in you?
The same is true for everyone else. The “difficult” person in your life isn’t inherently bad. They’re reacting to the atmosphere around them—and often, you’re part of that atmosphere.
The Ultimate Slavery
Here’s the hard truth: If someone else can decide how you feel—if they can make you angry, sad, or frustrated—you’re giving them power over you.
Isn’t that the ultimate slavery? Letting someone else control your inner world?
But here’s the good news: You don’t have to give them that power.
Own Your Inner World
- Stop Labeling
Drop the “good” and “bad” labels. See people as they are—flawed, complex, and capable of change. - Create a Pleasant Atmosphere
You can’t control others, but you can influence the energy around you. Be kind. Be patient. Be the calm in the storm. - Take Back Your Power
No one can “make” you feel anything unless you let them. Keep the privilege of your emotions to yourself. - Work with What You Have
The world isn’t full of ideal people. If you want to do meaningful work, you’ll have to learn to work with all kinds of people—even the “horrible” ones.
The Final Truth
Difficult people aren’t the problem. Your reaction to them is.
When you stop expecting others to be perfect, you free yourself from disappointment. When you stop letting their behavior dictate your emotions, you reclaim your power.
And when you create a joyful atmosphere, you’ll be amazed at how even the most “difficult” people can rise to the occasion.
So, stop fighting the world. Start mastering yourself.